My Love Language is not Gifts

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I am constantly reminding Fabian that my love language is not gifts. It seems that every time we have extra money or Fabian sees me eyeing something in a store he just has to buy it for me. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate it and love seeing the joy he gets from gifting me something but those gifts fill up my closet instead of my love tank.

So what's a love language? Our love language is how we communicate and receive love. By understanding our love language and our spouse's love language we can drastically improve our relationship. This works for friendships too! Understanding what your friend, spouse, or baby mama needs from you is super important. There are five of them, words of affirmations, acts of service, quality time, receiving gifts, and physical touch. Out of those five, one of them will stand out! Without even taking the quiz you probably know which one that is for you. So why am I sharing this now?

Well... Mother's day is right around the corner and I want you to think about how your baby mama would want to be celebrated. This goes for Father's day too cause that is coming up next month. Not all moms want gifts. Maybe she wants you to do something for her? Maybe she wants some alone time with you? Maybe she wants a card full of words? Knowing your baby mama's love language can make or break how you communicate your love to them. So let's break it down with some classic F & B mistakes!

Keep in mind that both our top love language is quality time, but my need for that is greater than his. And following that we both need words of affirmation. (You can see our results below)

When Fabian gives me a gift, yes like I said I do appreciate it but mama doesn't need new rain boots.

We don't make time for dates that don't include family members and our child. Easily a month or two can go by and we both feel distant from one another.

We run a red light and I say some disrespectful things about my husband's driving habits instead of thanking him for not letting my head slam onto the dashboard by braking too fast.

We just get too busy and over book our lives which leads to falling asleep before we can even say goodnight or how was your day?

I stay too quiet during the work day and don't send a cute little meme or corny quote from pinterest via text to my husband.

We Netflix but don't chill.

We expect each other to do things without any communication and then we get booty hurt and don't even acknowledge the other person when the task is completed.

Those are just a few of our recent errors but when we quickly corrected ourselves it's almost crazy how fast our relationship became even better. We planed date nights, we used our words to encourage, and we communicated better throughout the day and because all of those needs were met, it made our love for one another even better than it was before. We still hit rough patches every now and then but having taken this quiz and really understanding how the other person receives and communicates their love is some pretty important knowledge to have in that marriage tool box.