Is Self Care Selfish?
Let me first state the obvious, being a parent is hard. You’re responsible for keeping your littles happy and healthy and you’re on call 24/7. That in itself is an importante job!
But within your parenthood you can sometimes loose a bit of who you are and your identity slowly creeps into mama and papi status and stays there 100% of the time. If you don’t believe me put yourself in a group of mamas and see what they all talk about. Or try and go on a date with your spouse and see how long it takes for y’all to bring up your littles. The titles “mama” and “papi” are a blessing that you get to add to the rap sheet of life but on the top it still says, “(insert name here).”
A few weeks ago I was putting Jax to sleep one night and God pricked at my heart to apply for a job at Luna Antigua. Mind you… career wise, I already work 30 hours a week as an accountant. I serve at my church as a worship leader. I am a photographer. I am a blogger. I create online content for different brands. Let’s just say I wear many hats and underneath those hats you will find a lot of hustle. So when God told me I should go after another job I really thought it was crazy.
I let a week go by and He didn’t stop reminding me of this job opening. As an act of obedience I dusted off the ol’ resume, talked it over with Fabian and we both decided that I should apply for the position, not knowing the pay, the hours, or really even the commitment. I just knew God told me to do it, so I did. Soon after I applied I scored an interview for the position. We met at a local coffee shop and the owners, Sandra and Pamela filled me in on the requirements of the Luna Girl position. As we sat there talking for an hour I knew this job was for me and it was really hard to contain my excitement.
They asked me, “why now?” I first told them, “because God told me to do it.” But then as I continued to speak, more words started flowing out of my heart and tears started flowing down my cheeks. “This is for me. I need this.”
The stigma around putting yourself first, especially when you’re a mama sounds selfish and it sounds wrong. But just as we can all preach self-care til the cows come home… believe it or not but this is the same concept. Accepting a job because it makes me happy is a form of self care. Allowing time for myself away from my family is a form of self care. Giving myself a new and creative outlet is a form of self care. Getting out of my comfort zone and into the community is a form of self care.
God told me that this job was for me and as I graciously accepted the position I could not be more pleased. Some days I still can’t balance it all but I am finding, that when I submit my life to God and put myself first, I am the most successful, the most fulfilled, the most joyful, the most loving, and the most passionate form of myself. And as a result of that Jax gets a mama that is 100% present in her motherhood, and Fabian gets a wife that feels whole and complete in all that God has called her to be.
What are you doing that is just for you? Has God called you to do something but it seems a little out of your comfort zone? What little aspects of self care have you implemented into your day? Let’s talk about it!